6 Signs Of a Toxic Relationship
When we think about toxic relationship, our minds synonymize it to physical abuse and overbearing partners. Sure, that is toxic but those aren’t the only traits of a toxic relationship.
What are the signs of a toxic relationship? Sometimes we don’t realize when we are a part of something that is damaging to our well-being, or even worse if we are the cause of a toxic relationship. Either way, hopefully by the end of this article, you can tell and more importantly take action if these red flags are something you can relate to.
You’re constantly set for a trap.
Every question, every statement feels like a trap. A path laid out where at the end your partner “proves” a point. For example, instead of asking “Do you have plans with your friends tonight?” the question is phrased “Would rather hang out with your friends or spend some time with me?”. By any chance if you answer anything other than what your partner is expecting, it becomes a generalized war like “You always…” or “You never….” However, it’s an entirely different result if the roles are reversed.
Communication feels exhausting.
In any relationship, communication is key. When you feel everything you say is being turned against you, you slowly stop trying to even say what you feel because you know where it’s going to lead. When you say things like “I’m feeling really down about work lately” and the type of response you get would be along the lines of “You seem perfectly fine when your friends are around.” Everything feels like it’s YOUR fault.
There’s no effort.
Unfortunately, many people stay in a relationship for the sake of time. You feel like you’ve already invested 3,4,5 years of your time so you don’t want to end it.
Here’s a thought: Would you rather “waste” the years you spent on the relationship or your entire future?
It;s important to have your time to do your own thing separately but too much of anything can’t be good. At the end of the day, it’s a relationship that requires effort and love from both sides. If it reaches a point where you feel your presence feel like a burden to your partner, it’s time to ask “why?”
One sided.
You cannot fix everything by yourself.
As much as you’d think how spontaneous romantic trip, a surprise picnic or fancy gift would uplift the relationship, it needs one important ingredient: your partner.
Overtime when everything feels like a routine, the BOTH of you need to put in the effort to keep the relationship instead of expecting one person to carry and do everything. Don't guilt yourself to thinking you need to go above and beyond or you won’t be enough. You ARE enough. Always.
My way or my way?
A controlling behavior can grow into something very ugly. Just because you’re a couple, doesn’t mean you need to agree with everything your partner says. It doesn’t mean you love them any less just because you have a different point of view, and if they think so then…..
A supportive partner would respect what you have to say if they don’t agree with it. As much as everybody wants to be two peas in a pod, you’re still very different peas. AND THAT IS OKAY.
Me vs. You vs. The Problem
When there’s a problem or an issue, it should be the both of you vs. the problem NOT you vs. your partner.
Until this is understood, there would be added tension to the relationship every time the both of you face problems. If you feel like your partner doesn’t have your back, don’t brush that feeling off. Emotional support should be taken seriously and if he/she isn’t giving you that when you needed the most, that isn't a sign of a healthy relationship.
A relationship can start of as the sweetest, most romantic thing in your life but with time there is a chance the dynamic of it starts to change. When or if it does start to change, many people hold onto the memory of what the relationship USED to be while neglecting what it has become; an unhealthy relationship. Whether you’re in the sending or the receiving end of the toxicity in your relationship, it’s important to acknowledge facts.
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