Bad First Date(s)

July 4, 2019

Forget the search engines, if you’re wondering what defines as a “bad first date”, the GIF above should give you a rough idea. Maybe for some, you’re not that negative but at some point, I’m sure you’ve had bad first date(s) that made you go……

Before your minds spirals out of control thinking maybe there’s something “wrong” with you when you have a bad date, let me just say we have ALL been on that boat one way or another. Me? Mine was more of a cruise than a boat because I stayed on there a little longer than I cared for.

I’m sure I ruined quite a few dates on my account but here are the top 3 that comes to mind..

1. WORKING DURING MY FIRST DATE

No, you did not read that wrong; I’m just hopeless sometimes. It was exam season and I had a lot of papers to grade, so I (like a responsible adult that I barely am) thought maybe I can reschedule my date for another day. When I told my date I have a lot of work piled up he offered to help me (which later I found out was a joke, just like my ability to read between the lines). In my defense, I DID finish marking, I just needed help keying in marks of the 200 scripts.

So off I went for my date with my laptop and the scripts….and a lot of hope of actually finishing my work. Needless to say he had a horrid look on his face and I felt like an idiot. Long story short, I put the poor kid at ease, got him coffee and pretended it was a joke.

Spoiler: There wasn’t a second date.

2. THE ONE THAT STARTED LISTING DOWN BABY NAMES

This one still makes me think how things went from fine to ‘whooaa dude’ REAL FAST. The date was going quite well and somehow we landed on talking about names….just names, not baby names and DEFINITELY not our babies names. Out of nowhere he just blurted out “What should we name our babies?”. Although I was taken by surprise, I tried to laugh it off because it seemed like the best way to get out of an awkward situation. Did it work? NOPE. He was actually waiting for a response. After that, every conversation sort of leaned (more like collapsed) towards him trying to fit me in to his idea of a picket-white-fence future.

Maybe if I told him how many goldfish died on my account, he wouldn’t have been so pushy about baby names.

3. THE ONE THAT THOUGHT WE’RE IN THE STONE AGE

The only reason I went on this date was to accompany my friend on her date. Forced double-date to be exact but I was keeping an open-mind and worst case scenario, we could be friends (win-win, right?)

This was a tragic-comedy of a date, here’s why. He started of the date with the question “You don’t wear skirts or dresses during dates?” and it went on throughout the whole evening. I looked at my friend’s date but all he could mouth was “I’m sorry”. I would have left but I was quite curious to see how shallow he could get. Hence the case study started. Here are the list of ridiculous things that he said which I will probably never forget (EVER!)

Girls should always walk behind a guy.
Even a meal is a girl’s treat, she should hand the money to the guy to pay.
Girls should be in dresses and skirts (but not too short)
EVERY girl should know how to cook.

I genuinely cannot bring myself to add more to that. I hope he found his dream girl though, truly. As for my friend, they are to be married next year so I guess it was all worth it. I guess, my forgiveness would be their wedding gift.

There you have it, my worst first dates. As bad as it was, I can’t really say I regret any of them. Do I wish I could have done them better, maybe….but it was a fun learning experience (at least for me). Either way, keep an open mind when it comes to dating. A bad date makes a good story for your next date!

Every cloud has a silver lining. However if you have friends like mine when it comes to matchmaking, maybe it’s time to try LUNCH ACTUALLY where professional matchmakers screen through compatibility before sending you off on a date.

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